Originally published on AstroGeek and Heretical Oracles under the pen name Artemis.
“Coincidence doesn’t exist and goosebumps never lie. Your body already knows the answer. All you have to do is turn down your spinning mind, and continue to follow all the signs. Because you are always worthy of becoming your best and most actualized self.” – Victoria Erickson
Effective Date: April 7, 2016
Fuck, I hope you’re all ready. We’re kinda out in the wilderness now (astrologically speaking). We’ve entered the rabbit hole. This is the world of “when you thought you had one drink, you’ve really had two.” I don’t know about you, but the howling from that last full moon still has me a bit rattled. Anyone else feel that crushing sensation? Well. Guess what? It was needed. That was the exact energy we were begging for to burst out of our suffocating hibernation. Well, at least those of us with some backbone were asking for it! For those of you who chose to follow your highest ideals, SALUD! Congratulations! Good fucking morning! You’ve woken up into a new dawn. 2 Weeks after the Full Moon Eclipse in Libra, the moon wanes into darkness. It’s dark goddess time, and it’s new moon Aries time. That combination alone brings to mind a blazing, rumbling Volcano, exhaling the skeleton for new worlds over the ocean waters. It’s time to lay the foundation of our attitude for the next Zodiac cycle. Are you going to do this? Or are you going to lay back into the Piscean waters of 2015 cycle and get lost at sea until you wake up 5 years from now and realize you did nothing with your life again? Sorry, gotta tell it like it is. Don’t shoot the messenger. So. Aries is the sign of the pioneer, and you wont be able to get into this new cycle of things if you aren’t willing to explore and do a bit of battle. Although the planets may be bombarding us right now, these tarot cards are definitely rooting for you guys.
Moon- For Luna herself, I pulled the Page of Swords. Unsure little Page of Swords. She’s quite adorable. And she’s lost in the woods, just like fucking us. I mean, we prepared. We prepared a lot. We were bombarded with some weird shit the past couple of months (make that year), and we really, really thought we were ready. Well, we’re in the game now, so we better start to learn how to play. The Page of Swords represents an individual who has the knowledge necessary to complete the task at hand but lacks the confidence. Eternally in a cautious stance, the figure in this card is intellectually mulling over their infinite options of action. This card always reminds me of an uber nerdy kid feeling out of her element at a party. She could crush the brains of everyone there, but lacks the confidence in herself to do so with any sort of flair. Fortunately for us, we have a secret weapon. It’s Aries’ personal mantra. “Why the fuck not?” We have all of this Aries energy. What are we to do with it? We are to wage war and slaughter the hordes of enemies descending upon us. You think I’m joking? We need to reign in this Aries energy and use it to our advantage. Don’t let the ram roundhouse kick you off of the cliff. Aries energy is not something that most can handle. It is unpredictable. It’s powerful. It’s wild. It’s sexy. It’s completely and utterly bone headed. In order to tame a wild beast, one must remain calm and poised. We can take this lesson from the Page of Swords – calculation. From here, we must move. Don’t forget to move. Don’t forget to act. Don’t get sucked back into the illusion. You’ve got what it takes and intuitively understand what you must do. Don’t let anybody fucking intimidate you.
Sun- For the Sun, I pulled 6 of Cups. Lost things returned. I saw two things when I looked at this card. First, it is suggesting that in order for us to harness this Aries Sun energy, we must remember how to smell the flowers again. When you’re a kid (or when you’re on psychedelics), you see the world through hungry eyes. Try and look at your mundane world in this way, and the magic will begin to pop. Are you sick of your routine? There is a lesson in everything; even drudgery. Why do you think the karate kid had to wax cars and Luke had to lug Yoda through swampland? Find the magical flow, stop to enjoy things that can bring you some worldly pleasure, and something precious and lost may return to you. The inspiration you seek will come to you from the dreamy, pleasure seeking behaviors you take. Flirt with the world. Seriously, give it a try. It flirts back. So, what was my second intuition about this card? The past, the past, the past. Are you slaying those dragons? Are you telling your past to fuck off? It’s time. Make like Lot and don’t look behind you unless you want to see things you love turn into salt pillars. Look back only with sweet nostalgia. Forget the bitter. Save that bite for what’s coming and let dead things lie in their graves.
Saturn- For Papa Saturn, I pulled Knight of Pentacles. This is reminiscent of the Saturn Retrograde reading I did recently. Daddy of Karma is telling us to get our shit together. He is giving us this opportunity to rearrange and change course. Use it wisely. Especially pay attention to the things that you see every single day. There may be re-ordering required that you hadn’t noticed before. This is a time for foundation laying. Make sure the skeleton is sturdy, because we are building to the heavens.
Uranus- For Uranus, I pulled the 5 of Swords. Where the inner planets are all lovey dovey cups, the outer planets seem to be daggers and serious shit. This could indicate that although we are connecting to each other at very deep levels on the micro, the macro is going haywire. Uranus tells us that there is some negative energy brewing on the planet. We feel disconnected from the world at large. The powers that be have taken a selfish approach to our lives, and it looks like the growling coming from Uranus is his indication that karma is rolling back around. Chaos is coming to break those of us who have taken selfish actions against those who selflessly trusted us. Rebellion is on the horizon in the macro. Perhaps we will soon start getting our fair share?
Pluto- For Pluto, I pulled the Knight of Cups. Bloody idealism. Pluto is giving the macro an idealistic fervor. Unfortunately, this applies to all ideologies. Plutonian transformation in your personal life? It seems that once you drink from the Knight’s cup, your eyes will be opened to bliss. He tells us to let go of our mental restrictions and walk in the world of pure intuition. Interact with people in your life at a gut level (and hold on tight, because the transformations that will happen because of this will be immense). Pluto is going to force us to live up to our ideals or suffer. I don’t know about you, but I’m done suffering.
Mercury- For Mercury, I pulled 3 of Cups. This card represents good times with friends, drinking and merriment, time with your tribe, and spontaneous pleasurable happenstance. Those that speak your language will be very important right now. Who can you speak from the heart with? Stick to those people. They will lay the foundation for ideas to start blossoming. If you need to get unstuck, talk to those who bring about this joyous, inspirational, and freeing energy into your life. Healing will come from our “tribe.” Find each other. We need each other. Especially right now.
Venus- Well, for Venus I pulled the 2 of Cups. I dunno. It’s spring. Our blood is pumping again. Beltane (May Day) is a month away, and this isn’t the season to sit and stay. Run around and play. Fall in love with something. Someone. I don’t know. This card has a lion on it and two lovers sharing a cup. It takes great strength to be vulnerable with someone else; especially at the level this card is speaking of. The lovers are sharing their lifeblood; letting each other drink of their personal truths. Affection and openness can save you now. Find those that you can meld mind and heart with, and allow the truth to flow and become the foundation of this year’s values. Venus is, after all, the planet that rules over personal values. You may come to some powerful realizations about the importance of certain people in your life, or experience the emergence of some electrifying personas. Gravitate toward these people! If you don’t have anything like this in your life, say GOODBYE ASSHOLES to the imitation pieces in your life. Seriously, what’s the friggin point of existing in that mundane hell? You will understand when you ditch the basic and upgrade to those who speak your language. For those of you who already have met your tribe, cheers! You will truly feel the benefits of those relationships right now.
Mars- For Mars, I pulled the Lovers. Well, sounds like everyone is gunna get laid? Mars and The Lovers together obviously implies a lot of sexual energy. Coupled with the rest of the inner planets (3 of Cups for Mercury, 2 of Cups for Venus), it seems we are brimming with emotional drunkenness. Oh god. Careful out there. Hmm… Perhaps this is indicating that the push we need to succeed and to jump into our calling will come from those we share intimate connections with? There needs to be a melding of mind and body right now. Mars is the god of war or whatever, but right now he seems to be a bit subdued (perhaps due to his retrograde coming at us on April 17). TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS! War god is only sweet when he has physical indulgences. We had some abrupt changes in partnerships in our lives lately. There were a lot of painful hits to our friendships and relationships, but now is the time to meld again. There is opportunity to form some incredible partnerships if we jump at opportunity like a Saggo. If you have been sitting on your feelings, now is the time to make a move on it.
Neptune- For Neptune, I pulled the Magician. Here we go, guys. Nothing is as it seems, so we might as well take advantage of this. The veil is thin right now, so work your magic. Put your intentions into everything you do. Push your emotions through your eyes, your words, and your touch. A magician understands their environment and how to manipulate it to their advantage. This may be a great time for dream magic and divination, art and seduction. This may also be a good time to severe addictions, as you may come into power over your illusions.
Jupiter- For Jupiter, I pulled the 6 of Swords. What losses are you grieving? It is time to let go and get to the other shore. Heal. Move on. Jupiter asks us to expand away from this grief and come into joy. There is a karma coming to haunt us from the past (thanks Saturn retrograde), but please don’t let it sink your ferry. Ghosts are eternally hungry, and we don’t have enough food on this boat to feed them and us while also managing to get to the other side alive. There is only room on this boat for the living. We are in a transition period. Things are going to be hostile and your enemies are going to try and overtake you. You need to destroy their thunder by not giving a fuck. Seriously, you will find your power when you realize you can walk away at any time. Don’t let melancholy overtake you when you have so much beauty around you if you just step outside to see it.